ADDENDUM; thanks for all your thoughtful remarks (and in a few cases satirical, you know who you are!!! )i just want to clarify a few things tho;
First, this rant is nothing new as it has been the case for all of my career so far, i'm no more unhappy now than i have ever been (please note the "so far", faith springs eternal in my little heart)
Sadly i have had many great galleries/dealers over the years, and they are only marginally better at sellling my work than i am...So sad i didn't make them loads of money either...Currently thankful and apologetic to Todd Gresley at Ao5 Gallery in austin, and Daphne and David Benavides at Enchanted Studios in LA.
I am not likely to quit painting now or ever, feeling genetically incapable of quitting something i have undertaken, no matter how long it takes ( from my side , that's how i happened to stay married for just short of 30 years). I blame my Texan mommy for that, she and i and many i have known with Texan dna have a sheer cussed refusal to surrender , no matter what, and in the face of overwhelming odds against us (remember the alamo!!)
As to why this is my situation, I think one of my all time favorite dealers Darrell Couturier of Couturier Gallery in los angeles had it right when he told me years ago (late 80's); Figurative artists tend to not sell as well during their lifetimes because collectors of the period tend to see all figurative works as "Portraiture" and they don't want to have pics on their walls of people they don't know, after the passage of hundreds of years future collectors see the same figures as iconic or representative of a point of view rather than "portraits" of a specific person and are happy to collect them...I wasn't happy to hear this then, and fought against it, but now, looking back, i gotta admit, i think he was right! *sigh* . Well as they've also been saying for some time; "life is short, art is long"
Finally i have concluded; That if you can relieve your work of the burden of "getting out there and makin' mama some money", all will be well. It is with that goal in mind that i have relocated to Pennsylvania, where i hope to live for less than half of what it cost me to live in los angeles... If i am correct, i should be able to make it here a whole year for around the same amount it cost me in rent alone in Los Angeles ($24,000)... I'll let you know how that works out...
I'm adding another vintage self portraits from my first tenure in Los Angeles in the 80's, 90's
cmsa; WARNING A RANT COMING AHEAD!!!!!
Top things to NEVER SAY to an unhappy artist;
1. "Look at van gogh, he didnt sell one painting during his lifetime"
Yeah, remember how depressed he was during his life, and
ask yourself how
does that help me feel better???????
2. "don't worry, they'll sell better after you're dead"
Yeah, ditto, ask yourself how that makes me feel
better????????????
3. ps "Fixers" , when they hear me complain, have a strong conviction that they know the one thing that will solve my problem, if only i will listen, i recognize that this is not intended as insult but just someone sincerely trying to "help"...one says "just paint flowers" one says "subdue your palette " , one says "paint smaller" , one says "paint bigger" , "charge more (or less)" etc etc. Infact, i would hope that they would realize that in my 48 year career i've most likely BEEN THERE, DONE THAT, tried it already...
Forgive me for saying this, but sometimes that feels llike an insult to my intelligence...FORGIVE MY OCCASIONAL BAD ATTITUDE, BUT I GOTTA SAY, I COME BY IT HONESTLY....RANT OVER
